i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
why do cheetos always look like penises
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
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