puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
