I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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