One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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