just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
We're not piercing ourselves today.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
