Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
