omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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