so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
