if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
its liver damage thursday
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
