marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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