My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
