thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
