yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
