maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize