Is it because I queefed?
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize