Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize