i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize