I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
