Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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