he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
