Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
