She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize