You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
