Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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