all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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