had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
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