Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Randomize