Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
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