What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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