P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
