If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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