More tranny stories later!
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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