entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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