Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
