now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
