Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
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