he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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