We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
