why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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