im six kinds of drunk right now
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
