I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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