I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize