I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
