I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
i've created a new STD.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
