Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
