No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
