that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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