So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
