What a fucking waste of an outfit
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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