and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
